Eleven bog post prompts I wish people would actually write

I am going to be completely honest with you here. For once, something didn't get in the way of my blogging for two straight days. There was no spotty internet connection, and especially no horrible family emergency.

I had no freaking idea what to write.

Sure, I could ramble on and on about my  novel like most writers do in their blogs, but honestly, I've said enough about it already. Anything else I say would just be mindlessly repeating myself, and I don't want to look like I think I'm awesome. Bloggers who write as if they are humans instead of professors are much more fun to read, anyway.

So I Googled, "blog post prompts."

Lazy? Yes. Uninspired? Most likely. What I learned was that the Internet is seriously lacking some interesting blog post prompts. I know you guys aren't mindless sheeple: you aren't going to read through eight gigantic block-style paragraphs about what I think is wrong with other bloggers or society at large. Leave stuff like that underwater, and just let the tip of the iceberg show. The readers will get it. Human's analyze things by nature.

Anyway, this whole ordeal has prompted me to compile a list of prompts that I would rather read instead of some guy doing the often suggested, "interview with himself":

1. If kindergarders became murderous and took over the world, would you find any moral roadblocks interfering with your ability to kick them in the face and fight for your survival?
2. How many zombies do you seriously think it would take to screw in a lightbulb?
3. You are stranded on a deserted island with Newt Gingrich.
4. Everyone named Bill is joining a secret cult called, "The Society of the Bills." What are they secretly up to? If your name is Bill, do you join? If your name isn't Bill, pretend that you're infiltrated their facility somehow and found out their agenda for the first time.
5. What do you really...and I mean REALLY...think about those loud children in restaurants?
6. Why do you think Carrot Top's face looks that way?
7. A series of hydrogen bombs have detonated and rendered the surface of the Earth uninhabitable. You are in an underground facility with the cast of the Jersey Shore. You are the only ones left alive.
8. You're hiding from a vicious monster that has made its way into your house. You are locked in your room and typing up a blog post asking for help.
9. Do number eight, but pretend that your spacebar won't work.
10. You have just received word that Carl Rove has stolen Christmas.
11. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood...in the vacuum of outer space?

I think I'll run with some of these. I'm getting way too tired of thinking inside the box when it comes to blogging.