Merry Freaking Christmas!

I'll admit that there's been a huge lack of Christmas related posts because I've been finding it hard to get in the spirit of things. For me, the Christmas spirit requires cookies and candy, none of which I have been making. I've been getting into the spirit later and later each year, which means that it goes away even later. The past few years, it's been December 30th with me still singing carols and dancing around because I haven't started feeling all tinsel-y until the day before Christmas Eve. I used to go holiday crazy the moment Thanksgiving dinner was over and the dishes were in the dishwasher. I blame the lack of Christmas specials lately that aren't live-action Hallmark specials, but what can you do?

I miss the Grinch so, so much. And Rudolph and that weird little elf who wanted to be a dentist and ruin everyone's cookie-crunching, candy chomping fun.

I hope you all got what you wanted this year! If you got coal, all you have to do is shove it under a crapload of pressure and then throw your brand new diamond in Santa's stupid, judgmental face.

My list so far (I have over four Christmases to go to today x.x) includes some amazing perfume I asked for and a Kindle Fire, which makes me absolutely ecstatic. Once I get near some Wi-Fi when I get home I'll let you guys know just how awesome it is, but so far I'm dumbstruck. You know...because I'm not that hard to please and all.

Seeing as I have no money, Christmas is the only time I really get to have nice things, since other people are buying them and all.

Perhaps things will be looking up once I've finished my novel and am collecting a small pittance from 99 cent book sales that I can use to finance my addiction to television shows and books that I'm much too old to be watching/reading.

Children? Ba-HUMBUG. Regretsy v. Paypal

I'm going to let you guys in on a little secret. I hate PayPal just as much as PayPal loves money.

Believe me, ladies and gentlemen, that is a lot. They are nothing but a privately owned scam, and the majority of the Internet knows this. I would probably hand my money to a hobo with a needle currently in his arm and tell him to take it across the country to a vendor than send it through PayPal. To be completely honest with you, there isn't much of a difference between the two scenarios. Both of them involve you never seeing your money again.

A lot of you may not know that I follow Regretsy, because the website is freaking hilarious and they're always doing some sort of charity work that makes my heart as fuzzy as two week old refrigerator fungi. This year, for example, the site owner was to donate thousands of dollars to poor children who weren't going to get a Christmas this year. The money was quickly raised before PayPal froze the account and claimed that charities weren't worthy causes. They ordered the money refunded and kept their "fixed fees". I truly feel for the parents who have already told their children that they will be getting a Christmas after all and now have to break their hearts in telling them otherwise.

Apparently, donating money to a sick cat is a worthy cause, but helping poor people is not. As all of you know I am a poor people myself, and I am therefore how you say.... "outraged."

Within minutes both the Internet and Paypal's Facebook page exploded. Twitter showed them no mercy, as Twitter does not know the meaning of the word. The Consumerist, The Daily Dot, The Wall Street Journal have already at least linked to the story, and this only happened a matter of hours ago. The Internet is a hydra with many heads that only multiply as you sever them.

Even Barbara Streisand had to learn that, you know.

                                                         Image by mau3ry via Flickr

We're very sorry, little Timmy, but you just aren't a cat. 

Winter is Coming.

Like many bloggers out there, I am doing an entire post dedicated to the encroaching season--as if most of you are too thick to stick your heads outside and say, "Well damn, it's cold out here!"

Yeah. I know you guys know that it's almost snow season. I just thought I would take a little bit of time to talk about why winter is my favorite season of the year, not that sweltering, hoity-toity summer.

First of all, I love snow with a raging passion. There is nothing that induces euphoria in me quite like looking out the window to see the ground covered in white. It makes the nights and the days brighter, in addition to being, you know, freaking beautiful.

I'm a fan of snow, in case you haven't figured it out already.

Of course, there's the Holidays. Santa Claus, presents, candelabras, trees, and all of that good stuff. The last three months of the year are chocked full of holidays and celebration.

As I typed this it started to snow.

....*ahem*....

HELL YES.